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How do you make iTunes play everything in mono?

Jan 15, 2008 • Karen

About ten minutes ago, the left speaker on my 3.5-year-old iBook, Zachary, went out. It doesn't seem to be coming back. I noticed when "Only You" by the Caesars came on and I couldn't hear any of the guitar solo. Boo.

I can shift my computer's sound output 100% to the left or the right in the System Preferences, but that doesn't mono-ify stereo sound files (in other words, the other track just goes dark). There's no obvious preference in iTunes to make it play stereo files in mono. Anyone more tech-savvy than me know how to make it do that?

For those keeping score at home, the things broken on my computer:

  • Computer won't stay closed when I close it (the latch doesn't latch)

  • Light on the power cord is dark half the time (at least it still carries power)
  • It's REALLY FREAKING SLOW OMG (1.0 GHz, 768 MB RAM, can barely run Photoshop, Google Earth makes it crash)
  • It's stained/dusty/dented to all heck
  • Despite having my entire music collection (and movies, and comics, and iPhoto gallery) on my external hard drive at school, the 30 GB internal drive is permanently full
  • Screen is really dark/flickers when I move it (hasn't gone out--yet)
  • CD drive is broken
  • The internal Bluetooth that it came with died at some point (finally noticed this a week ago and got a USB Bluetooth dongle)
  • Left speaker is (now) dead

I'm both loathing Zachary as a semi-useless hunk of plastic and praying my baby makes it one more semester. I was crazy jealous of Nelson's shiny new MacBook, but it lately seems to be experiencing Navy Stripes of Death (see: Pastel Stripes of Death) and black-curtain crashes on a semi-regular basis, so... schadenfreude?